Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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