Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize