So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
