You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
