It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
