I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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