I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
