The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Randomize
