The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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