He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize