You just made me feel so damn special
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I lost the right to judge tonight
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Randomize
