She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
he just fucked me for my cheese..
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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