dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
