She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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