You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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