you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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