All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
