That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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