well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
