Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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