Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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