Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?