Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
