If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
