He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
