you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Randomize
