Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
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