i permit you to call me
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
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