Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Randomize