i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
