She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
