No, you can still breathe under the balls.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
