hell yes lets make some ravioli
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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