something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
