i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Randomize
