yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Randomize