I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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