God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
