If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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