My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Randomize
