uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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