I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
either way he was missing a nipple.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
