Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
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