so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
