so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
