Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
I'm really busy with my period
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