Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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