Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
They took my balls.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
