FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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