And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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