Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
